Tony Banks Quotes

Anthony Louis Banks, Baron Stratford was a British Labour politician who served as a member of Parliament from 1983 to 2005 and subsequently as a member of the House of Lords. He served as Minister for Sport from 1997 to 1999. He was well known in the House of Commons for his acid tongue. Wikipedia  

✵ 8. April 1942 – 8. January 2006
Tony Banks: 16   quotes 0   likes

Famous Tony Banks Quotes

“…so unpopular, if he became a funeral director people would stop dying”

"The wit and wisdom of Tony Banks" http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/4593562.stm, BBC News, 8 January 2006.
on former Prime Minister John Major

“I am finding the inherent politeness of this place quite destabilising. Having come from a House where politeness is about as rare as an orderly queue at a London bus stop, the culture shock on entering your Lordships' House has been profound. Indeed, such relentless politeness is not merely destabilising, but positively exhausting.”

maiden speech to the House of Lords http://www.publications.parliament.uk/pa/ld200506/ldhansrd/vo050720/text/50720-23.htm, 20 July 2005; quoted by United Kingdom Parliament World Wide Web Service
contrasting the House of Lords with the House of Commons.

“Since the great days of Jimmy Greaves, it's the only time anyone's managed to score five times in a Chelsea shirt.”

"The wit and wisdom of Tony Banks" http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/4593562.stm, BBC News, 8 January 2006.
after a kiss-and-tell story appeared detailing how former Conservative minister David Mellor, his close friend and fellow Chelsea fan, wore football kit during sex.

“Living proof that a pig's bladder on the end of a stick can be elected to Parliament”

"Tony Banks close to death after stroke" http://news.independent.co.uk/uk/politics/article337229.ece, The Independent (online edition), 8 January 2006.
on right-wing Conservative MP Terry Dicks

“At one point Portillo was polishing his jackboots and planning the next advance. And the next thing is he shows up as a TV presenter. It is rather like Pol Pot presenting the Teletubbies.”

Tribune Rally, September 1997; The Right Hon wag http://www.guardian.co.uk/g2/story/0,,1682818,00.html, The Guardian, 10 January 2006.
on Conservative politician Michael Portillo.

Tony Banks Quotes

“I have gone to a safe house, as they say, so I might as well have a different name”

"Banks changes name for Lords life" http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/4123628.stm, BBC News, 23 June 2005.
on taking the title Lord Stratford when he entered the House of Lords.

“She is a half-mad old bag lady. The Finchley Whinger.”

An MP who took no prisoners, The Daily Telegraph, 2006-01-09 http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/main.jhtml?xml=/news/2006/01/09/nbanks109.xml, http://www.geocities.com/Axiom43/insults.html
on former Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher again.

“We'll look back and wonder who were these barbarous people, just like we look back at those who supported bull-baiting”

"Tony Banks close to death after stroke" http://news.independent.co.uk/uk/politics/article337229.ece, The Independent (online edition), 8 January 2006.
on fox-hunting.

“She behaves with all the sensitivity of a sex-starved boa constrictor”

Tony Banks close to death after stroke, The Independent (online edition), Sophie Goodchild, 2006-01-08 http://news.independent.co.uk/uk/politics/article337229.ece, http://www.guardian.co.uk/g2/story/0,,1682818,00.html
on former Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher

“He was a fairly competent chairman of Housing [on Lambeth Council]. Every time he gets up now I keep thinking, "What on earth is Councillor Major doing?" I can't believe he's here and sometimes I think he can't either.”

The Right Hon wag http://www.guardian.co.uk/g2/story/0,,1682818,00.html, The Guardian, 10 January 2006.
on seeing John Major in the House of Commons as Prime Minister.

“I found it intellectually numbing, tedious in the extreme. All you were was a sort of high-powered social worker and perhaps not even a good one. So I won't miss that.”

"Obituary: Tony Banks" http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/4591310.stm, BBC News, 9 January 2006.
comments on constituency work after standing down as an MP

“Personally I wish the police had truncheoned the English fans to death, but I can’t really say that on the record.”

"Hopes fade for Tony Banks after holiday stroke" http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,2087-1975281,00.html, The Times Online, 8 January 2006.
comment on football hooliganism abroad after allegations of police brutality against rioting English fans.

“To make matters worse, they have elected a foetus as the party leader. I bet a lot of them wish they had not voted against abortion now!”

"Beyond a joke: the ones that went too far" http://politics.guardian.co.uk/redbox/story/0,9029,1157599,00.html, Guardian Unlimited, 27 February 2004.
comment on both the Conservative Party leader William Hague and the abortion debate at a Labour Party conference fringe meeting, 1997.

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