Robert Benchley: Nothing

Robert Benchley was American comedian. Explore interesting quotes on nothing.
Robert Benchley: 58 quotes0 likes

“Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said nothing.”

Robert Benchley

As quoted in With Truth as Our Sword (2005) by C E Sylvester, p. 205

“A baby is shown sitting on the floor. He appears to be about a year and a half old. Incidentally, he is a very plain baby. Strewn about him on the floor are the toys that he has been playing with. There are a ball, a rattle, a ring, a doll, a bell and a pair of roller-skates. Evidently, the candidate is supposed to be aghast at the roller-skates in the possession of such a small child.
The man who drew that picture had evidently never furnished playthings for a small child. I can imagine nothing that would delight a child of a year and a half more than a pair of roller-skates to chew and spin and hit himself in the face with. They could also be dropped on Daddy when Daddy was lying on the floor in an attempt to be sociable. Of all the toys arranged before the child, the roller-skates are the most logical. … That is my great trouble in taking tests and examinations of any kind. I always want to argue with the examiner, because the examiner is always so obviously wrong.”

Robert Benchley

"Measure Your Mind", in Love Conquers All (1922)

“I don’t want to be an alarmist, but I think that the Younger Generation is up to something…. I base my apprehension on nothing more definite than the fact that they are always coming in and going out of the house, without any apparent reason.”

Robert Benchley

"The Children’s Hour" in My Ten Years in a Quandary and How They Grew (1936)

“Anyone will be glad to admit that he knows nothing about beagling, or the Chinese stock market, or ballistics, but there is not a man or woman alive who does not claim to know how to cure hiccoughs.”

Robert Benchley

"Stop Those Hiccoughs!", My Ten Years in a Quandary and How They Grew (1936)