P.G. Wodehouse: Trending quotes (page 2)

“Everything in life that’s any fun, as somebody wisely observed, is either immoral, illegal or fattening.”

“I could see that, if not actually disgruntled, he was far from being gruntled.”

“What ho!" I said.
"What ho!" said Motty.
"What ho! What ho!"
"What ho! What ho! What ho!"
After that it seemed rather difficult to go on with the conversation.”

“I'm not absolutely certain of the facts, but I rather fancy it's Shakespeare who says that it's always just when a fellow is feeling particularly braced with things in general that Fate sneaks up behind him with the bit of lead piping.”

“A melancholy-looking man, he had the appearance of one who has searched for the leak in life's gas-pipe with a lighted candle.”

“If there is one thing I dislike, it is the man who tries to air his grievances when I wish to air mine.”

“I know I was writing stories when I was five. I don’t remember what I did before that. Just loafed, I suppose.”

“Unseen, in the background, Fate was quietly slipping the lead into the boxing-glove.”

“Mike nodded. A sombre nod. The nod Napoleon might have given if somebody had met him in 1812 and said, "So, you're back from Moscow, eh?”

“It was one of those parties where you cough twice before you speak and then decide not to say it after all.”

“I am not always good and noble. I am the hero of this story, but I have my off moments.”

“The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun.”

“There is only one cure for grey hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.”

“Marriage is not a process for prolonging the life of love, sir. It merely mummifies its corpse.”

“If he had a mind, there was something on it.”

“You would not enjoy Nietzsche, sir. He is fundamentally unsound.”

“I just sit at my typewriter and curse a bit.”

“In a series of events, all of which had been a bit thick, this, in his opinion, achieved the maximum of thickness.”

“As we grow older and realize more clearly the limitations of human happiness, we come to see that the only real and abiding pleasure in life is to give pleasure to other people.”