Patricia Briggs: Trending quotes

“Fear makes idiots out of us all, at some time or other.”

“Some people are like Slinkies. They aren't really good for anything, but they still bring a smile to my face when I push them down a flight of stairs.”

“Bran was stripping her futon down to the bare mattress when she entered her apartment. It was sort of like watching the president mowing the White House lawn or taking out the trash.”

“I don't break; I bounce.”

“Knowledge is a better weapon than a sword.”

“Take a note: it usually works better if you wait until I do something stupid before getting mad at me.”

“Bran was the only person I knew who could use words like "blackguard" and make them sound like swear words-but then he could have said "bunny rabbit" in that tone of voice and weaken my spine with the same shiver of fear.”

“When I die of heart failure the next time you frighten me like that, you can put that on my gravestone—‘I didn’t mean to startle her.”

“A second floor window opened, and Kyle stuck his head and shoulders out so he could look down at us. “If you two are finished playing Cowboy and Indian out there, some of us would like to get their beauty sleep.”

I looked at Warren. “You heard ‘um Kemo Sabe. Me go to my little wigwam and get ‘um shut-eye.”

“How come you always get to play the Indian?” whined Warren, deadpan.

“Cause she’s the Indian, white boy,” said Kyle.”

“Over a lifetime of dealing with difficult women, I have learned it is often better to give into their demands immediately.”

“Nothing says you're sorry like a dead bunny.”

“It is one of those lessons that every child should learn: Don't play with fire, sharp objects, or ancient artifacts.”

“Anger is stupid, and stupidity will kill you more surely than your opponent's blade.”

“Love thy enemies, it says in the scriptures. My foster mother always added, "At the very least, you will be polite to them.”

“Never trust a mechanic who drives new cars. They're either charging too much money for their work, or they can't keep an old car running - maybe both.”

“Why is it that all cars are women?" he asked.

"Because they're fussy and demanding," answered Zee.

"Because if they were men, they'd sit around and complain instead of getting the job done," I told him.”

“Women are the bloodthirsty sex," said Ric sadly. "We get the reputation, but it is only because the women stand behind us, and say, 'Kill it. Squish it.”

“MS. THOMPSON, it said in heavy block letters, PLEASE KEEP YOUR FELINE OFF MY PROPERTY. IF I SEE IT AGAIN, I WILL EAT IT.”

“I don't like it when I outweigh my men.”