Joseph Heller: Trending quotes (page 2)

“The Texan turned out to be good-natured, generous and likeable. In three days no one could stand him.”

“Be glad you're even alive.'
Be furious you're going to die.”

“I want to keep my dreams, even bad ones, because without them, I might have nothing all night long.”

““From now on I'm thinking only of me.” Major Danby replied indulgently with a superior smile: “But, Yossarian, suppose everyone felt that way?” “Then,” said Yossarian, “I'd certainly be a damned fool to feel any other way, wouldn't I?””

“Every writer I know has trouble writing.”

“There is no disappointment so numbing… as someone no better than you achieving more.”

“When I look up, I see people cashing in. I don't see heaven or saints or angels. I see people cashing in on every decent impulse and every human tragedy.”

“Well, he died. You don't get any older than that.”

“mankind is resilient: the atrocities that horrified us a week ago become acceptable tomorrow.”

“Morale was deteriorating and it was all Yossarian's fault. The country was in peril; he was jeopardizing his traditional rights of freedom and independence by daring to exercise them.”

“He was a self-made man who owed his lack of success to nobody.”

“Destiny is a good thing to accept when it's going your way. When it isn't, don't call it destiny; call it injustice, treachery or simple bad luck.”

“What do you do when it rains?"
The captain answered frankly. "I get wet.”

“You have deep-seated survival anxieties. And you don't like bigots, bullies, snobs or hypocrites. Subconsciously there are many people you hate."

"Consciously, sir, consciously," Yossarian corrected in an effort to help. "I hate them consciously.”

“He was never without misery, and never without hope.”

“Where were you born?"
"On a battlefield," [Yossarian] answered.
"No, no. In what state were you born?"
"In a state of innocence.”

“He had decided to live forever or die in the attempt, and his only mission each time he went up was to come down alive.”

“Let's take a drive into the middle of nowhere with a packet of Marlboro lights and talk about our lives.”

“Prostitution gives her an opportunity to meet people. It provides fresh air and wholesome exercise, and it keeps her out of trouble.”