Ellen DeGeneres: Trending quotes (page 2)

“I'm so unfamiliar with the gym, I call it James!”

“It's failure that gives you the proper perspective on success.”

“Procrastination is not the problem. It is the solution.

Procrastinate now, don’t put it off.”

“I personally like being unique. I like being my own person with my own style and my own opinions and my own toothbrush.”

“I wonder what will happen if i put a hand cream on my feet, will they get confused and start clapping?”

“Take a nap in a fireplace and you'll sleep like a log.”

“Leaning forward in your chair when someone is trying to squeeze behind you isn't enough. You also have to move the chair.”

“Things will get easier, people's minds will change, and you should be alive to see it.”

“Our flaws are what makes us human. If we can accept them as part of who we are, they really don't even have to be an issue.”

“My life is perfect even when it's not.”

“One time I actually cleaned out my closet so good I ended up on the cover of Time magazine.”

“When life gives you lemons…. they could really be oranges.”

“So be who you really are. Embrace who you are. Literally. Hug yourself. Accept who you are. Unless you're a serial killer.”

“The thing everyone should realize is that the key to happiness is being happy for yourself and yourself.”

“Dan: 'Ah, well, I hope this didn't have anything to do with me.'

Ellen: 'No, not unless you played Cat Woman in Batman.”

“Answers to Frequently Asked Questions:
Yes.
Yes.
No.
One time in high school.
Three times in my twenties.
Rocks no salt.
Yes.
Four.
Never. And how dare you!
I will take no further questions.”

“Haiku sounds like I'm
Saying hi to someone named
Ku. Hi, Ku. Hello.”

“Baloney is just salami with an inferiority complex.”

“You just have to keep driving down the road. It's going to bend and curve and you'll speed up and slow down, but the road keeps going.”