Augusten Burroughs: Trending quotes

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Augusten Burroughs: 162 quotes5 likes

“The line between normal and crazy seemed impossibly thin. A person would have to be an expert tightrope walker in order not to fall.”

Augusten Burroughs book Running with Scissors

Source: Running with Scissors

“Red hair is great. It's rare, and therefore superior.”

Augusten Burroughs

“I myself am made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions.”

Augusten Burroughs book Magical Thinking

Source: Magical Thinking

“I think I love him, but I also think that you can love people who aren't good for you.”

Augusten Burroughs book Dry

Source: Dry

“Our lives are one endless stretch of misery punctuated by processed fast foods and the occasional crisis or amusing curiosity.”

Augusten Burroughs book Running with Scissors

Source: Running with Scissors

“You deserve to need me, not to have me.”

Augusten Burroughs book Running with Scissors

Source: Running with Scissors

“I like flaws and feel more comfortable around people who have them. I myself am made entirely of flaws, stitched together with good intentions.”

Augusten Burroughs

Source: Magical Thinking: True Stories

“My mother began to go crazy. Not in a 'Let's paint the kitchen red!' sort of way. But crazy in a 'gas oven, toothpaste sandwhich, I am God' sort of way.”

Augusten Burroughs book Running with Scissors

Source: Running with Scissors

“Like cubic zirconia, I only look real. I'm an imposter. The fact is, I am not like other people.”

Augusten Burroughs book Dry

Source: Dry

“I came to think that maybe God was what you believed in because you needed to feel you weren’t alone. Maybe God was simply that part of yourself that was always there and always strong, even when you were not.”

Augusten Burroughs book A Wolf at the Table

Source: A Wolf at the Table

“Stars should not be seen alone. That's why there are so many. Two people should stand together and look at them. One person alone will surely miss the good ones.”

Augusten Burroughs book Dry

Source: Dry

“I am prone to envy. It is one of my three default emotions, the others being greed and rage. I have also experienced compassion and generosity, but only fleetingly and usually while drunk, so I have little memory.”

Augusten Burroughs

“I will please shut the hell up the day you please drop the hell dead”

Augusten Burroughs book Running with Scissors

Source: Running with Scissors

“Just as I had long suspected, a person didn't really need math for anything anyway. Maybe some people did. Some limited people.”

Augusten Burroughs Possible Side Effects

Source: Possible Side Effects

“I just look at her and she creeps me out. She looks like she would eat a baby. Not that she's fat. She just looks hungry in some dangerous way that can't be explained. She's always so nice and friendly. Exactly the disposition of a baby killer.”

Augusten Burroughs book Running with Scissors

Source: Running with Scissors

“Think of your head as an unsafe neighborhood; don't go there alone.”

Augusten Burroughs book Dry

Variant: your mind is like an unsafe neighborhood; don't go there alone.
Source: Dry

“The truth is that nobody is owed an apology for anything. Apologies are lovely when they happen. But they change nothing. They do not reverse actions or correct damage. They are merely nice to hear.”

Augusten Burroughs

Source: This Is How: Proven Aid in Overcoming Shyness, Molestation, Fatness, Spinsterhood, Grief, Disease, Lushery, Decrepitude & More. For Young and Old Alike.