“Now that you have seen how I help people transition from homosexual to straight, you can buy my new book or you can purchase my therapeutic tapes, and don’ t forget my hope and healing videos. I’ m also available for speaking engagements. And, of course, I take credit cards. God bless. Amen. Be straight.”

“You picked me up from school
You attended all my sporting functions
You bought me a car
Gave me use of a credit card
But how can I feel pain,
How can I feel pain,
How can I feel pain
When you're being so supportive?”

“I sincerely hope, trust, and pray that this part of my journey will not seem as dull to you as it did to me at the time, or as it does to me now while I write of it. But now I come to think of it, it cannot seem as dull, for I had to walk that wretched thirty miles or so all the day long, whereas you have not even to read it; for I am not going to say anything more about it, but lead you straight to the end.Oh, blessed quality of books, that makes them a refuge from living! For in a book everything can be made to fit in, all tedium can be skipped over, and the intense moments can be made timeless and eternal.”

“I think they meant it when they said you can't buy love, but now I know you can rent it, a new lease you are my love!”

“As I mentioned in my previous homosexual video, never overlook the influence that can be caused by a single person. Everyone in the world, despite how much you score in a test, what job you’re in or how intelligent you are, has influence.”

“Speaking personally, you can have my gun, but you'll take my book when you pry my cold, dead fingers off of the binding.”

“I do take responsibility. When you’re in public life, even if you believe that it’s not an opinion that you think is fair or founded, you do have to take responsibility. And I do. And I also have, you know, very much committed to the best of my ability my energies and efforts to helping people. That’s something that I care deeply about. And I will continue to do that, to demonstrate by my past actions and my present levels of commitment and plans that people can count on me.”

“You call me Mr. Pitiful;
Baby that's my name now, oh.
They call me Mr. Pitiful;
That's how I got my fame.
But people just don`t understand, now
What makes a man feel so blue, now
Ooh, they call me Mr. Pitiful;
Cause I lost someone just like you, now.”

““What happened wasn’t fair!”
“Fair? You mean to claim with a straight face that you buy into that heresy, my boy?””

“Jack: What do you think of this card I wrote for Don? "To Don from Jacky, Oh golly, oh shucks. I hope that you like it, It cost forty bucks.”