“I would like to say that I live in Hollywood and I sleep in Simi. I am in LA every single day. I do not want to move there because I like the escape, the quiet in Simi.”

“Why are you so sad, akri? (Simi)
I’m not sad, Simi. (Acheron)
Yes you are. I know you, akri, you gots that pain in your heart like the Simi gets whenever she cries. (Simi)”

“Simi? You got some free time? (Kat)
Of course I do. You know akri on Olympus with that heifer-goddess I want to eat, but he won’t let the Simi have no dinner. So why you calling me, little akra-kitty? (Simi)”

“No, I don’t live in heartache. I don’t cry myself to sleep or any of that. I am, I tell myself, over it. But I do feel a void, icky as that sounds. And—like it or not—I still think about her every single day.”

“Oh, gross! Zombie goo. (Caleb)
Ooo, I wonder if it tastes like chicken? What do you think? (Simi)
I think I’m never eating guacamole again as long as I live. (Caleb)”

“I’d rather have my eyes gouged out. (Urian)
If I do that, can the Simi eat them? (Simi)
You have to share if you do! (Xirena)”

“Tell him to leave me alone, Astrid. Else I’ll have to barbecue him and make akri angry at me. I don’t want to make akri angry. (Simi)
Simi? Is that you? (Astrid)
Yes. C’est moi. The little demon with hornays. (Simi)”

“I don’t have to do nothing you say, you old heifer cow. And you are old. Really, really old. And a cow, too. (Simi)”

“I like that Zarek. He quality people! He even gave me a can opener so I don’t have to use my fangs. I like that. Metal is hard on the teeth. Pork and beans popsicle. Yummy! My favorite! (Simi)”

“I feel like those words are going to be engraved on my tombstone. It was brought up every single time I did an interview. I apologized for it; I acknowledged it; I said it was true; I said it was a joke. Do I regret it? I used to regret. Not anymore. I don't regret anything anymore. Would I hope that I would never say something like that ever again? Yes. Am I capable of saying something like that again? I hope not.”