“Diplomacy is the same as saying "nice doggie" until you have a chance to pick up a rock.”

— Will Rogers

Attributed to Francis Rodman, in volume 64 of The Reader's digest (1954)
Other variants also attributed to Wynn Catlin in Kiss Me Hardy : Quotations Ancient and (Very) Modern (1982) by Roger Kilroy; and to Winston Churchill by Dick Applegate in a speech reprinted in Volume 75 of "The Carpenter" (1955)
Misattributed

Adopted from Wikiquote. Last update June 3, 2021. History

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American humorist and entertainer 1879–1935

Fletcher Knebel (1911–1993) Novelist, journalist

“If I had to pick a religion, I'd pick Buddhism. Buddhism is a kindly religion. It says you got a chance… it's got humor, it's got wisdom, it says to be nice to each other. All the rest of them have gods that want to beat the crap out of you if you defy the rules.”

Harlan Ellison (1934–2018) American writer

Interviewed by J. Michael Straczynski Clue book for the computer version of I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream http://infidels.org/kiosk/author/harlan-ellison-207.html

“The essence of what you have to say you pick up before you're twenty.”

Patrick White (1912–1990) English-born Australian writer

In The Making (1970)

“I'm not picking up dog shit. I'm a rock star.”

Ozzy Osbourne (1948) English heavy metal vocalist and songwriter

The Osbournes television show

“You can do a lot with diplomacy, but with diplomacy backed up by force you can get a lot more done.”

Kofi Annan (1938–2018) 7th Secretary-General of the United Nations

Press conference http://www.findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m1309/is_1_35/ai_54259243 regarding the use of force to gain compliance from Saddam Hussein (24 February 1998)

“Take these chances
Place them in a box until a quieter time
Lights down, you up and die.”

Dave Matthews (1967) American singer-songwriter, musician and actor

Ants Marching
Remember Two Things (1993)

“Life is not fair. Get used to it… Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.”

Bill Gates (1955) American business magnate and philanthropist

Though widely attributed to Gates on the internet, this list of life suggestions is actually based on one from Charles J. Sykes. More information at Snopes.com http://www.snopes.com/language/document/liferule.htm <br class="br">Misattributed

“Sometimes I pick up a book and I say: Well, so you've written it first, have you? Good for you. O. K., then I won't have to write it.”

Doris Lessing book The Golden Notebook

Saul Green in "The Golden Notebook"
The Golden Notebook (1962)

“You have to pick yourself up from where you fell.”

Chang Ching-sen (1959) Taiwanese politician

Chang Ching-sen (2018) cited in " Taichung to host first Asia-Pacific Youth Games in 2019: mayor http://focustaiwan.tw/news/aipl/201809030021.aspx" on Focus Taiwan, 7 March 2018.

“He picked the rock back up. “Do you believe that it floated?”
“No!” I sulked, rubbing my temples.
“Good. It didn’t. Never fool yourself into perceiving things that don’t exist.””

Patrick Rothfuss book The Name of the Wind

Source: The Name of the Wind (2007), Chapter 10, “Alar and Several Stones” (p. 78)

“Diplomacy is the same as saying "nice doggie" until you have a chance to pick up a rock.”

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