“If I were omnipotent and omnibenevolent I wouldn't be so damn ineffable.”

Speech on Religious Intolerance as presented at the Pittsburgh Opera House (14 October 1879).
Context: They say the religion of your fathers is good enough. Why should a father object to your inventing a better plow than he had? They say to me, do you know more than all the theologians dead? Being a perfectly modest man I say I think I do. Now we have come to the conclusion that every man has a right to think. Would God give a bird wings and make it a crime to fly? Would he give me brains and make it a crime to think? Any God that would damn one of his children for the expression of his honest thought wouldn't make a decent thief. When I read a book and don't believe it, I ought to say so. I will do so and take the consequences like a man.

Source: The Truth

Ronan about Adam
pg 141
The Raven Cycle Series, The Raven King (2016)

Catch-22 (1961)

In a letter to the editor of the Atlantic Monthly.
Context: By the way, would you convey my compliments to the purist who reads your proofs and tell him or her that I write in a sort of broken-down patois which is something like the way a Swiss-waiter talks, and that when I split an infinitive, God damn it, I split it so it will remain split, and when I interrupt the velvety smoothness of my more or less literate syntax with a few sudden words of barroom vernacular, this is done with the eyes wide open and the mind relaxed and attentive. The method may not be perfect, but it is all I have.

Annotations on John C. Thirlwell's copy of The Collected Earlier Poems (c. 1958)
General sources

The Pusher (1968)

McKinley's supposed reaction to the capture of Manila, as quoted in Isaac Asimov's Book of Facts http://books.google.com/books?vid=ISBN0803893477&id=soIn15_8_BEC&pg=PA360&lpg=PA362&dq=isaac+asimov&as_brr=1&sig=N7a-MSVa9fFYuZBxJbosM31-Y7M, pages 360-361.
Attributed

Source: Oceans of Fire