Ricky Gervais citations

“Remember, when someone says ‘you’ve changed,’ it usually just means you’ve stopped living your life their way.”

“What’s the point in having humor? Humor is to get us over terrible things.”

“If your boss is getting you down, look at him through the prongs of a fork and imagine him in jail.”

“People confuse the subject of the joke with the target of the joke, and they’re very rarely the same.”

“If there is a god, why did he make me an atheist? That was his first mistake. Well, the talking snake was his first mistake.”

“I think a comedian's job isn't just to make people laugh. I think it's to make people think.”

“If you can laugh in the face of adversity, you’re bullet-proof.”

“If you try to please everyone you’ll please no one.”

“Beliefs do not change facts. Facts, if one is rational, should change beliefs.”

“Being on the edge isn’t as safe, but the view is better.”

“Just because you’re offended, doesn’t mean you’re right.”

“People who criticize you have usually never achieved anywhere near what you have. Most of them would be too scared to even try. Keep going.”

“The truth doesn’t hurt. Whatever it is, it doesn’t hurt. It’s better to know the truth.”

“You have options. You can either continue to be miserable or you can just stop being angry at everyone and accept the way things are. Allow yourself to live.”

“It’s awful to think of people eating dogs, but some people eat pork. I don’t, but some people do. And a pig is just like a dog, there is no difference between them.”

“Why don’t you believe in God? I get that question all the time. I always try to give a sensitive, reasoned answer. This is usually awkward, time consuming and pointless. People who believe in God don’t need proof of his existence, and they certainly don’t want evidence to the contrary. They are happy with their belief. They even say things like “it’s true to me” and “it’s faith.” I still give my logical answer because I feel that not being honest would be patronizing and impolite. It is ironic therefore that “I don’t believe in God because there is absolutely no scientific evidence for his existence and from what I’ve heard the very definition is a logical impossibility in this known universe” comes across as both patronizing and impolite.”

“Science seeks the truth. And it does not discriminate. For better or worse it finds things out. Science is humble. It knows what it knows and it knows what it doesn’t know. It bases its conclusions and beliefs on hard evidence -­- evidence that is constantly updated and upgraded. It doesn’t get offended when new facts come along. It embraces the body of knowledge. It doesn’t hold on to medieval practices because they are tradition. If it did, you wouldn’t get a shot of penicillin, you’d pop a leach down your trousers and pray.”

“Animals are not here for us to do as we please with. We are not their superiors, we are their equals. We are their family. Be kind to them.”

“So if you do win an award tonight, don't use it as a platform to make a political speech. You're in no position to lecture the public about anything. You know nothing about the real world. Most of you spent less time in school than Greta Thunberg.”

“That’s the other thing I learned that day, that the truth, however shocking or uncomfortable, in the end leads to liberation and dignity.”

“You won’t burn in hell. But be nice anyway.”

“The best advice I’ve ever received is, ‘No one else knows what they’re doing either.’”

“Life is just a series of peaks and troughs. And you don’t know whether you’re in a trough until you’re climbing out, or on a peak until you’re coming down.”

“Never confuse your right to say what you believe with a right to never be disagreed with and ridiculed for saying what you believe.”

“Be happy. It really annoys negative people.”

“In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth… Then he said, “Let there be light.” Which means he made the entire universe in the dark!”

“When I see a headline ‘Guess who’s going out with who?’ I don’t guess, and I don’t click.”

“Some of you are really smart. You know who you are. Some of you are really thick. Unfortunately, you don’t know who you are.”