Tucker Max: Likeness

Tucker Max is Internet personality; blogger; author. Explore interesting quotes on likeness.
Tucker Max: 52   quotes 1   like

“You look like the type of people who would criticize a misspelling in a suicide note.”

Tucker Max book Assholes Finish First

Source: Assholes Finish First

People , Suicide

“Great Holy Jesus--it looks like he fell into Kentucky Fried Movie.”

Tucker Max

The Austin Road Trip http://www.tuckermax.com/archives/entries/date/the_austin_road_trip.phtml#281,
The Tucker Max Stories

“We can't get kicked out of McDonald's! This is like the DMZ of drunk eating.”

Tucker Max

The Absinthe Donuts Story http://www.tuckermax.com/archives/entries/date/the_absinthe_donuts_story.phtml#280,
The Tucker Max Stories

“I was very thirsty. Laying in the bathtub, looking up at the faucet, I thought of a great idea. So I turned the nozzle on full blast, and put my mouth up to it. It was like drinking from a firehose, but I was too drunk and dehydrated to notice that I was getting completely soaked, or that water was shooting out of my nose.”

Tucker Max

My 21st Birthday http://www.tuckermax.com/archives/entries/date/my_21st_birthday.phtml#612,
The Tucker Max Stories

Idea , Drink , Water

“You ever wake up in the middle of the night because a couple of cats are clawing each other to death outside your window? That's what it's like listening to you speak.”

Tucker Max

The Absinthe Donuts Story http://www.tuckermax.com/archives/entries/date/the_absinthe_donuts_story.phtml#280,
The Tucker Max Stories

Death , Cats , Night

“Every girl asked me, "What makes you god's gift to women?" Some answers:
13 inches. Who ever thought it could be too big?
I have 20 million dollars and terminal cancer.
I like to listen.
I'm a convicted sex offender.
Have you seen this face? Look at how hot I am!
I like to cut up hookers.
Bend over and I'll show you.”

Tucker Max

The Tucker Max Stories

Women , God , Sex , Girl