Lenny Bruce citations

“Liberals can understand everything but people
who don't understand them.”

“There are never enough 'I love you's.”

“Every day people are straying away from the church and going back to God.”

“I want to perform an unnatural act.
in”

“If Jesus had been killed twenty years ago, Catholic school children would be wearing little electric chairs around their necks instead of crosses.”

“The 'what should be' never did exist, but people keep trying to live up to it. There is no 'what should be,' there is only what is.”

“The only honest art form is laughter, comedy. You can't fake it… try to fake three laughs in an hour -- ha ha ha ha ha -- they'll take you away, man. You can't.”

“Satire is tragedy plus time. You give it enough time, the public, the reviewers will allow you to satirize it. Which is rather ridiculous, when you think about it.”

“I am influenced by every second of my waking hour.”

“If you live in New York, even if you're Catholic, you're Jewish”

“Let me tell you the truth. The truth is what is, and what should be is a fantasy. A terrible, terrible lie that someone gave to the people long ago.”

“If I get busted in New York, the freest city in the world, that will be the end of my career.”

“Life is a four-letter word.”

“A Jew, in the dictionary, is one who is descended from the ancient tribes of Judea, or one who is regarded as a descendant from that tribe. That's what it says in the dictionary, but you and I know what a Jew is: One Who Killed Our Lord… there should be a statute of limitations for that crime.
in Lenny Bruce Without Tears 1972”

“The role of a comedian is to make the audience laugh, at a minimum of once every fifteen seconds.”

“If something about the human body disgusts you, the fault lies with the manufacturer.”

“I'm not a comedian. I'm Lenny Bruce.”

“In the Halls of Justice, the only justice is in the halls.”